Cebu Regis Leader Ivy Ko Final Integrative Paper

Dear Prof,

Attached is my FIP. Thank you for the push - for me to put this 'procrastinated dream" into fruition. <That is a good term for Lecturers -  "pushers of wisdom".   Leaders are pushers to action.  Hahaha>

Thank you for the wisdom.

Best Regards

Ivy

WHERE I AM NOW

My life story, how I evolved into who and where I am today is highlighted piece by piece in the papers I have submitted. 

1. Genogram 

Edward Yap Uy and Irene Chua Tan was introduced to met and married in in their early 30's. Edward is a Cebuano while Irene hails from Binondo, Manila. They are blessed with 4 daughters, and I am the second child. Both of our parent's ancestors are from China, thus our family is 100% Chinese. We speak the Fukien language at home and we follow typical customs and traditions like respecting elders, grandparents living with their son's family when they get married, offering food and praying to our ancestors during their death and birth anniversaries.  Respecting for elders was a value my parents give a very high importance upon. 

Growing up, focus was doing well in school. I don't remember much discussions on what do we want to do, what our dreams and aspirations are, what we want to achieve in life. Having romantic relationships before graduation is frowned upon, talking about emotions is not a normal thing. Love is felt more thru actions rather than words. 

My role is usually the events organizer and conscience to my sisters not based in Cebu on their responsibilities to my parents.  My dad is the ultimate decision maker, while my mom is most of the times assumes the follower role. My family, especially Mama would always tell me what are the things and habits I need to improve on. My dad would always ask me how I am, what are my concerns and what am I doing with them.  Just like my Ama, I am self-sufficient and a go getter. From my dad, I got his people and networking skills. Mama is very prayerful and religious, I developed my spiritual habits from her. 

Diabetes and Heart condition exists in my dad's family (with papa being a triple by-pass survivor) and colon cancer in my mom's side. Knowing these genetics, I have to be very conscious of my health. I keep a healthy lifestyle, exercise at least three times a week, Eat healthy, keep myself fit all the time and undergo annual medical check-ups. 

Learnings: (Self-awareness)

The people who know you best are also the best persons to tell you areas you need to improve on constructively. Having a family that is informs me my weak points is definitely a big help in my self-awareness process.

Family background and Growing up atmosphere has a very huge impact on a person's outlook in life. 

2. My life story JC Campbell

I grew up in a sheltered conservative Chinese culture. I was very introverted and I found it difficult to be in a social situation. I was given very good education which I am extremely thankful about. My parents made sure I grew up street smart and not very bookish. They arranged summer jobs for me which taught me the values of frugality and hardwork. Mama ensured I know how to do household chores. Ironically, it was papa who taught me the vanities like how to dress up and taking care of my hair and skin. 

When I graduated from college and started working, I started to see and observe difference in people I meet and work with, different values, different priorities, different Outlook and Confidence in themselves. I then realized how shy, reluctant, and insecure I am compared to them. As I matured in the organizations I've worked with, gained new friends and extended my network, joined socio and civic organizations, it boost up my morale. 

Having a good, challenging and on-the-go job kept me really busy, but I was very passionate about it. I got to learn, see my inputs, lead and motivate a team, mentored by the best people, have direct relationship with the big bosses, plus the perks of traveling, meet new people, create worldwide contacts was really fulfilling. I was really inspired and I felt I was having the best time in my life. 

On the other side when I am at home, I don't feel the same support from my mom. While everyone was happy and supportive of my career, I felt my mom always has something bad to say. At first, I tend to blame my mom for my insecurities, for being indifferent to our emotional needs while growing up. I always complain that because she often compares me with her friend's kids, I grew up thinking I am inadequate. When I was so happy that I earned my wings and began to fly, she always brings me down and feel vulnerable. However, as I matured and became a mom myself, I can see the different perspective. I am lucky that I grew up in a loving environment, worked at one of the best jobs and was able explore the world at a young age. Mom didn't have the same experience. Her upbringing was really based on the confines of home as she was helping the family business before she got married. Her world was much smaller compared to what I have experienced, that is why her outlook in life was different. Plus the fact she moved to Cebu after marrying, her friends and family are all back home in Manila. She was also adjusting. As I got married and became a mother myself, it was then I fully understand how she felt, and I felt really guilty of all the negative feelings I have towards her. I know try my best to have more bonding moments with her so I can make up for the lost times. 

Learnings: (Self-awareness, Love, Ingenuity, Heroism)

There is nothing constant in the world, but change. You have to step out of your comfort zone, constantly challenge status quo, as this is the only chance that you will grow.

I am forever grateful to my mentors for a very quick fast tracking of my career. Leaders are never selfish. They give back and share. Develop and nurture.

I am in charged of my own happiness. 

My mom is a very caring person, she just shows it in a different way. She just cannot express her emotions in words and thoughts, but thru her caring actions. What I perceived as negative before was in fact her way of showing love. Finally now, I have felt my mother's love.

3. Defining moment

I have identified and grouped together defining moments in my life

1. Summer Jobs - I may have sacrificed a lot of play and travel opportunities on summer breaks as  I started to have summer jobs as early as 7 but the early years working taught me a lot and of course, gave me a savings account. I got to learn work early on and in my opinion, this is why it helped me succeed in my career. 

2. Daughter – Papa having stroke and triple by-pass was the first difficult event in my life. The thought of losing him was something I could not imagine. This drew the family closer and more faithful This was also an eye opener for the family to take care of our health and live a healthy lifestyle. Lastly, It taught us to be closer as a family, and be more communicative. 

3. Career woman – I had a very fast paced career and I was really passionate about it. I learned a lot and I am thankful for everyone who gave me the opportunity to learn and achieve an executive position before I reached 30. But I had to make a choice. Though 10 years work experience is quite early for someone to retire, I made sure that I have reached my goal in my career first before taking a breather.  

4. Wife - Having been so focused on career, I prayed to find somebody I can share my life and have a family. I prayed for someone who is mature enough to support my work, and someone who will be proud of me and let me continue to grow. All this I have found in my husband and much more. Despite loving my work and the corporate life so much, I had to make a choice. Will I pursue my new life as a wife in Cebu, or join the bandwagon and come home every weekend to be with my family. Since my personal vision is to be happy on whatever I do – I decided to resign from my job prioritize on myself and my husband first.

5. Mother - From a career woman to mother – life changed 360 degrees but I am not complaining. I am so happy that I am there for his first everything. I get to breastfeed him, bring him and pick him up at school, read him books and play with him.  I want to raise a child of character. It is not easy for a career woman to drop everything just to be a full time mother. It takes a lot of planning, mind and emotional conditioning, and sacrificing to do. But as you see your family in a happy and healthy condition, everything seems so worth it.

6. Student - Getting a MBA degree has been something I want to attain way before, but I just could not find the time to do it. Good thing I am blessed with a partner who encourages me to do things that I am passionate about. I started June 2015, and I am now on my 4th subject. I am enjoying it to the hilt. I want to practice a balanced work-family-student life that I can still enjoy the things that matter most. I want to share and teach the things I have learned, as for me, this is my definition of how success and leadership.

Learnings: (Heroism, Ingenuity)

Continuous learning should never stop, because if it does, then you get to grow old faster. Learning has no boundaries.

 "Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others. "—Jack Welch.  <developing others is awesome>

Leadership, be it professional or personal life, is an evolving process. It may be born, made, or situational. There is a leader in everyone and it is up to us should we want to develop and maximize our potential.

4. Enneagram

Taking advantage of how I understand myself in dealing with how life is thrown at me now gave me a better perspective of how I should charter my life moving forward. I appreciate learning the Enneagram tool so I can augment my self-awareness process. I don't have to question why I am like this as compared to other people, is because this is they way I am wired. Knowing this help, I need to harness my strengths and work out my weaknesses. I should do more  "examen" analyses asking myself if I am really happy with my life's current state, if this is the situation I want to be really at, if this is how I have envisioned myself to be. 

The exam result say I am I got the Type 3 (Achiever) with a Two (Helper)-Wing, which is described to be "The Charmer".

Type 3: Achiever Says:

Strength	Weakness
·         optimistic, friendly, and upbeat ·         providing well for my family ·         recover quickly from setbacks and to charge ahead to the next challenge ·         stay informed, knowing what's going on ·         competent and able to get things to work efficiently ·         able to motivate people	·         does not like inefficiency and incompetence ·         the fear on not being seen as successful ·         comparing myself to people who do things better ·         putting on facades in order to impress people ·         always being "on." It's exhausting.

Type 2: Helper says:

Strength	Weakness
·         able to relate easily to people and to make friends ·         knows what people need and being able to make their lives better ·         generous, caring, and warm ·         sensitive to and perceptive about others' feelings ·         enthusiastic and fun-loving, and have a good sense of humor	·         not being able to say no ·         low self-esteem ·         feels drained from overdoing for others ·         being upset that others don't tune in to me as much as I tune in to them ·         working so hard to be tactful and considerate that I suppress my real feelings ·         fear of being selfish

Learnings: (self-awareness, heroism)

Today, I am balancing the roles of a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, a consultant, and a student. I want to become a leader in these different roles successfully. I want to lead a life where I can show my child/ren confidence and help them succeed in life by becoming the best person they can be. 

I want my children to learn the importance of leadership early on so they will be good leaders, leading from within.

5. Internal and external factors that shaped me

Knowing the internal and external factors that shaped me is a path to self- awareness. Taking advantage of how I understand myself in dealing with how life is thrown at me now gave me a better perspective of how I should charter my life moving forward. I am very happy with my life's current state, but life is constantly changing single day, we should be adaptive and also update our skills, our outlook, and not just stay in our comfort zones. 

External Factors

• Influence of my Ama, father and family – who I am today is largely due to the people who matter most – my family – who are there to guide and instill in me the right values and direction in life.
• Mentors – having gone thru several bosses made me learn a lot. Adjusting to each boss' management styles and accepting challenging assignments made me grow personally and professionally. 
• Travel – Having traveled for both work and leisure has opened my world and outlook in life.

Internal Factors

• Willingness to take up challenges gave me a fast track growth in my career
• Cheerful, approachable, and upbeat enabled me to gain friends quickly and become more efficient to get things I need to do done.
• Currently, I struggle in maintaining my individuality, continuing my career, study or just drop everything so I can be with my child 24/7. I often feel torn apart, but I know with time management and planning, this matter will be resolved.

Learning: (Self-awareness, Ingenuity)

No one can make another person self-aware, except myself, so leaders must mold themselves. Only I can muster the will, courage, and honestly to search myself.  

Everyone has diversified background and skills with different priorities and outlook in life. I need to be more adaptable, flexible, and patient, especially when dealing with the lower level positions as they not get intimidated.

Humility and Respect. Being on top doesn't mean you are right all the time.  Listen to your superiors, subordinates, and peers. Let each know what information you need to get a job done. Your authority comes from your organization's trust in you, so it Is best that you maintain that trust with you.

 "Successful careers are not planned. They develop when people are prepared for opportunities because they know their strength, their method of work, and their values"- Peter Drucker

WHERE AM I GOING

Since 2007, in a Creating the Future seminar I've joined, I already identified my Personal Vision statement which is to be happy. Happiness what you feel when what you want to happen happens. My definition of happiness is to live a good life whereby I achieve Mental, Physical, Financial, Emotional and Spiritual bliss. From then until now, achieving that goal has always been the priority especially when I am faced with a trajectory in life. In my five year plan – I have identified the following as my life goals:

PERSONAL:

1.      1. Finish MBA
2.       Become comfortable in the kitchen
3.       Develop a better relationship with the Lord
4.       Find a Hobby-learn a musical instrument

FAMILY:

1.     .  Have a second baby and continue to exclusively breast feed
2.        Travel with my family
3.        Take good care of my parents

CAREER:

1.         Go back to Work
2.         Invest in stock market earn at least 8% ROI annually
3.         Teach and share my knowledge

The direction of where I want to go is summarized in my life's leadership wheel where my health of happiness is based on the 5 energies of Mental, Physical, Financial, Emotional and Spiritual covering the aspects of my Personal, Family, and Professional Life, guided by my values and beliefs. My Passion to lead, excel and serve, together with my life's motivators - Growth, Achievement and Social encircles the wheel which is navigates my life's principles and sense of fulfillment.

                                                 

HOW WILL I GET THERE?

To start with, let me inventory my life's SWOT thru this analysis

                                            

STRENGTH	OPPORTUNITIES
·         Competent, and works effectively ·         Cheerful, approachable, and upbeat ·         Ability to see the big picture ·         Analytical ·         Loyal ·         Resilient ·         Perceptive	·         Professional growth ·         Good relationship with network ·         Availability of corporate career to go back to ·         Availability of life options
WEAKNESS	THREAT
·         Impatient with inefficiency and incompetence ·         Self-Critical ·         Everything seems to be "Important" ·         Don't how to say No	·         Time constraints ·         Changes in economic and corporate landscape ·         Not getting any younger ·         Critical timespan of child raising

To achieve my life goals, i have laid out these plans with Timelines:

	Aspects	Goals			Plans and Strategies		Timeline
	Personal	1. Finish MBA			Get one subject per term, however, take a maternity leave delivery of baby#2 until 6 months		Finish MBA Degree latest by 3rd sem 2017-2018.
		2. Become comfortable in the kitchen			Be confident, and don't let my insecurities get ahead of my fear Be able to have at least 5 specialty dishes		ASAP By the end of 2016
		3.Develop a better relationship with the Lord			Decide if I stay on being a Roman Catholic or I follow my husband's Christian religion		June 2016
		4. Find a Hobby-learn a musical instrument			Start researching on which instrument I am most interested in Invest in time and energy for full time lessons Be able to have my first recital		1stQ 2017 Start 2nd half of 2017 December 2018
	Family	1.            Have a second baby and give her the same attention and care as my firstborn –			1. 2nd baby by 1Q2017 2. Be able to exclusively breastfeed 3. Continue to be a full time mom until second baby reaches 5 yrs old		Get pregnant by 2Q2016
		2. Take good care of my parents			1.       To understand my parents' need better 2.       Be able to set aside more quality time for them regularly 3.       Build their medical history file		ASAP
		3. Travel			1. Go on a weekend trip to CDO ( visit great grandparents) and the Beach house in Daanbantayan to destress 2. Save to travel to Hokkaido Japan, Prague Czech Republic, Switzerland, Johannesburg, Vigan and Batanes.		At least once every 2 months Trips at least once every year
	Professional	1.       Invest in stock market and earn at least 8% ROI annually			1.       Be disciplined to look at the PSE everyday 2.       Develop a trader attitude so I can take advantage of the market movements 3.       Be confident to take the leap by starting small		Start by February 2016
Professional			2.       Invest in stock market and earn at least 8% ROI annually <now risky;   stock markets are on free fall>	4.       Be disciplined to look at the PSE everyday 5.       Develop a trader attitude so I can take advantage of the market movements 6.       Be confident to take the leap by starting small		Start by February 2016
			3.       Go back to work – be it corporate (CFO as an ultimate position) or manage family's business	1.       Finish my MBA. 2.       Learn Accounting functions (as my specialization is Finance and Risk Management) 3.       Manage my husband's Accounting Department 4.       Decide whether I go to corporate or become an entrepreneur		ASAP
			4.       Teach and share my knowledge	1.       Continue teaching SME's to share my professional knowledge 2.       Find the right venue to fit my teaching preference		ASAP 1Q 2018

According to George, Sims, Mclean and Mayer in the Discover your Authentic Leadership Article, Integrating their lives is one of the greatest challenges leaders face. To lead a balanced life, you need to bring together all of its constituent elements—work, family, community, and friends—so that you can be the same person in each environment. <ordering ones life;  AVP and FIP should have done that to you>

How do I plan to integrate these elements to achieve my goals and live a balanced life?

Elements	Goals	Steps
Work	Find a Family-Work- Studies Balanced Life	Prioritize and Manage time more effectively Set up effective help and support system
Family	Have annual family strategic planning sessions with my immediate family, my parents and my siblings.	Set out agenda, identify date, and educate strategic planning process to my family Identify and Implement strategic plans, most especially relating to our parents' Heath Management
Community	Give back to the community all blessings we have continuously received, be it in Financial, emotional, technical, educational or motivational assistance	Become more active in the civic organizations I am a member of like USC Campus Lions Club. As a family, we can start with assisting our own house helps and their families.
Friends	Reconnect with friends and have more frequent meet ups	Communicate regularly, and plan out regular mother and child activities

I am in charge of my own happiness, as I am also incharged of chartering my own life's direction. Discovering my authentic leadership requires a commitment to developing myself. Like musicians and athletes, I must devote myself to a lifetime of realizing my potential.  Everything that happens in our lives always have a reason. Difficulties and challenges are there to mold us, make us better versions of ourselves. However, it's really up to us to transcend the situation, and to look beyond the difficulties, and see these as opportunities to grow, as a person, and as a leader.

I am still on my journey towards becoming a level 5 leader. And I agree with Darwin Smith who looking back when he was saying his retirement speech that "We should never stopped trying to become qualified for the job."