Regis Cebu Leadership - Leader Dovie Sainz Genogram

Regis Cebu Leadership

Leader Dovie M. Sainz

Genogram

A.   Grandfather (Father's Side)

My grandfather on my father's side, Antonio Reyes Montinola, Sr., <related to Amon Trading?> is the eldest of three siblings. I do not know much about my great-grandparents because my grandfather eloped with my grandmother from Iloilo a few years before WWII. All I know is that my great-grandparents were wealthy landlords in Iloilo and Bacolod but squandered most of their inheritance through gambling and excessive spending. My grandfather was in his early twenties when he secretly married my grandmother who was just seventeen years old at that time and brought her to Cebu City to raise their family.

I. Papang Tony was a successful businessman, dedicated father and loving grandfather. He was an undergraduate of UST and married early. He spoke Ilonggo even when he already lived many years in Cebu. Papang was very athletic. He used to be a member of his school's swimming team. He was very handsome and had many admirers when he was young. But after he met my grandmother, he completely changed and became a devoted husband and father to their 5 children.           

He was very passionate about his hobbies, which were fishing and taking pictures. Papang would bring his family to the beach in Talisay every Sunday. He had a pumpboat named Evenrude and I as told that he would often bring his sons for a ride under the Mactan Bridge. He taught many of his grandchildren how to fish which was very difficult to do as little children because we were always excited and making noises.

Papang loved to take pictures. He had the most modern cameras and equipment for taking photographs during the early sixties. He would give   photos in elegant frames to our relatives as birthday and Christmas gifts.

Papang Tony was also very religious. Together with my grandmother, they attended mass daily.  My grandparents were very close to the Carmelite sisters. Aside from financial support, I believe it was my grandfather's time and volunteer work as sound system operator that made the Carmelite sisters appreciate him more. My best memory of Papang Tony was that he was really a family man.

Papang was never the type who would complain about his health. So when he was diagnosed with throat cancer, we were all caught by surprise that the cancer had spread and there was nothing we could do about it. He became bed-ridden and was given palliative care. Papang passed away on December 26, 1995, the day my elder sister got married. We knew he wanted to attend the ceremony and that was the only way he could be present at the wedding.

 

II.  Tito Ed was an enlisted man of the Philippine military. He served in the   army division. He married Tita Aida who was a teacher. I think that I only saw him once or twice and I was very young then to recall anything abut him.  I never met his family because they never visited us in Cebu and my parents did not bother to go and visit them, too.

III. Tita Daday is an accountant. Her husband is Tito Jun, a historian. She lives in the USA with her husband and 3 children who are also professionals and working there. Tita Day often comes to visit the Philippines. One of   their sons, Kerwin, made a website that traced the Montinola Family tree   as far back as the 1850's. He was honored by Aurelio Montinola with a dinner at the Manila Polo Club for his research and website.

B. Grandmother (Father's Side)

My grandmother on my father's side, Rosita Tupas Montinola, is the second among three siblings. My great-grandparents came from Camiguin in Mindanao. I do not know how my grandmother ended up meeting my grandfather in Iloilo but I think because of the war at that time, many people were displaced. My grandmother was orphaned at a very young age. However, she was very fortunate not to be separated from her siblings while they were growing up during the war.

I.  Tito Mons was a lawyer who became a judge and practiced in Davao City. He married Tita Mely who came from the Jacinto Rubber clan. Tita Mely was a dedicated housewife. They had several children who are professionals. Their clan is very big and we sometimes see them when they come to Cebu. Tito Mons can be very strict with other people but he was always nice to my sisters and me. They were not very well off financially but I guess the presence of his children and grandchildren who lived with them or near their home made him a very peaceful, contented and happy person.  Tito Mons was the last among his siblings to pass away.

II. Mamang Nene is my grandmother on my father's side. As the elder sister, she took care of both her siblings. Mamang Nene was not immediately accepted by my grandfather's family since she was an orphan, very young and did not belong to the same social circle as them. However, my grandfather loved her enough to marry her and bring her to Cebu away from his family.

Mamang Nene was a very hardworking and protective mother. She was also very good in cooking. When they moved to Cebu, she immediately worked for her auntie's native delicacy factory. My great-aunt brought                               the turrones recipe from Camiguin to Cebu. After several years, my grandmother asked my great-aunt if she can make her own brand of turrones. My great-aunt gave her blessings and allowed my grandmother                                    to put up her own brand because my great-aunt wanted to give her brand to my grandmother's younger sister.

Aside from this business, my grandparents were able to put up a small restaurant along Colon St. They served snack foods and displayed their turrones there.  It was a very successful venture. However, when my                                  grandfather passed away, my grandmother became addicted to gambling and she incurred many loans. My father had to pay for the loans and my grandmother went to Canada to live with my aunt for more than 10                                    years.

When she returned to Cebu, she was already very frail and stayed mostly inside our house. She lived with us for about 3 years until she passed away of old age. I missed her so much because I think I learned so much                                     from her life – both good and bad examples. I like to think that I was the closest and dearest grandchild to her. I don't blame her for gambling because I think that she thought at first that she could control it until she                             got addicted. After that, it became a disease of the mind that went beyond her control.

III. Mommy Patchoy was the youngest sibling. She married an engineer. Most of their seven children are professionals: doctor, engineer, accountant and nurses. She was a loving wife and mother who passed away very early due to lung cancer. Mommy Patchoy was the ultimate optimist. She could always find joy in everything around her. Even when she was sick, she was happy telling everyone that she felt ok because her son who was a doctor was making sure she was not in pain.

                       

C.  Grandfather (Mother's Side)

My grandfather on my mother's side, Regino Francisco Sr., came from Bataan in Luzon.  I do not have much information about my great-grandparents because I never met them and our relatives here in Cebu do not really know them. Their family became separated because of the war. But I was told that they were very educated people and they encouraged their children to finish college even when times were difficult.  However, not all completed college education.  My grandfather was the second child among eight siblings.

I. Tyang Siding was the eldest sibling. According to my mother, she did not finish college. She became a housewife.

II. Lolo Regino was my grandfather on my mother's side. He graduated mechanical engineering from UP Manila in 1936. As an engineer, he was very good in analyzing situations and providing solutions to problems. His greatest skill was in fabricating machines that helped speed up production of different products ranging from bakery items to fashion accessories. Together with my grandmother, they left Manila for Cebu City. They opened a small restaurant that eventually gave them enough capital to buy a piece of property along Sanciangko Street. Later they built a 5-storey hotel, the Tagalog Hotel.

My lolo was a very hardworking person. He was very strict with my uncles but lenient on my mother and other daughters. He taught all his children to do business and not be contented with just being employed.  He said  "Kahit na toothpick lang ang ginagawa ninyo, basta sa inyo ang pagawaan ng toothpick, successful kayo.

III. Tyang Inyang was a teacher. There is not much information about her.

IV. Tyang Rita was a nurse by profession. She lived a very modest life. Tyang Rita was never married and would visit her relatives once in a while.

V. Tyang Titang was a housewife. There is not much information about her and her family.

VI. Tyang Doring was also a housewife. She was the last one to pass away at the age of 91. She lived in Tondo, Manila. She would often visit Cebu and Bataan when she was younger.

VII. Tyong Rudy was an engineer. We never met him.

VIII. Tyang Eli/Linda was a teacher. She was married and had several children.

D.  Grandmother (Mother's Side)

My grandmother on my mother's side, Teresa Francisco Francisco, was the third child among eight siblings also.  She was the only one who graduated from college among them. Their family hails from Cavite. Four of them moved to Cebu City with my grandmother. Their family is very close even though they had many difficulties in life. Our generation is also closer to each other because our elder relatives made sure we know our cousins up to the fourth degree. However, since there are so many of them, it is very difficult to really know everyone.

I. Tyong Densyo was the eldest.  He came with my grandparents to Cebu and helped them with the restaurant business. He married and went back to Manila to start a family. Tyong Densyo was a funny person. He always had a ready smile on his face and funny stories to tell.

II. Tyang Biling was a housewife who also moved to Cebu with my grandparents. She was always at home in Peace Valley and hardly goes out except to go to church. She would only attend parties if the party were at their house. She was a devoted wife and mother. She is also well loved by her nieces and nephews because of her calm personality.

III. Lola Teresa was my grandmother on my mother's side. She was a very strict but loving mother who encouraged all her children to go to mass and say the rosary every day. She heard mass daily and was very active in Sto. Rosario Church. Lola was the disciplinarian of their family. She made sure all her children knew their roles and she assigned chores to all of them.  My mother was tasked to do the cooking. And for this I am forever grateful.

 Lola Teresa was also a very good businesswoman. While my grandfather ran the hotel, she was the one running the Tagalog Kitchenette. She was very good in cooking Filipino foods that their restaurant became very successful. Many politicians and movie stars would go there to have lunch or dinner.

My Lola was very serious about her children's education. She made sure they all finished high school. Only my mother and one brother did not finish college education. My lola was very friendly and resourceful. She                           knew where to send her children so they can get the best education.

My lola was not afraid to speak her mind always. She would tell anybody to correct his or her mistakes. During the 1980's, our family had a beach house in Mactan and we would all go there on Fridays and come back to the city on Sundays.  Lola Teresa insisted that our family build a chapel inside our property in Punta Engano, Mactan, since we were there almost every weekend so that she can invite a priest to say mass and the people could attend mass there.  She was also very close to Cardinal Vidal. There is a piece of property in Labangon which she donated to the church for them to build a retreat house and shrine of Our lady of Fatima.

My lola was in a comma for nine days before she passed away. I clearly remembered my mom telling us that our lola was rushed to the hospital ICU after she suddenly fainted while praying the rosary midmorning.  My                                     relatives said that the nine days at the ICU was like a novena before she left us peacefully. She was 86 years old.

IV. Tyang Puring was a housewife. She did not finish high school. She lived with her husband and 8 children in Cavite.

V. Tyang Inting was an employee and a very devoted mother to her 5 children.  She did not graduate from high school also. Tyang Inting worked for my aunt in the fashion accessories business for many years as a stringer of beads to form a necklace. She is one of the lucky ones who had all her children and grandchildren around her every special occasion even though they had very limited resources. Their presence made up for the material things they did not have. To me, that is more important than any amount of wealth in the world.

VI. Tyang Helen is the least known relative on my mother's side. I don't think I met her or if I did, I may have been too young to remember.

VII. Tyang Nena was a housewife and raised three children. She was very close to her husband and devoted her life to him.

VIII. Tyang Lilit is their youngest and the most smiling among the siblings. She did not finish college. She was married to Tyong Chris who is the YMCA administrator for many years now. They have three children who are all professionals: doctor, accountant and nurse.  She was a diabetic and in her old age, they had to amputate her right leg.

E.  Father Side

My father, Ramon Tupas Montinola, is the eldest among five siblings. They may not be as close as my mother's side but they keep in touch with each other through phone and emails. Two siblings are in Canada and two are in the USA.

I.  My father was born in July 1944. He was educated in a public school and  went on to study at the Philippine Military Academy. He graduated with the Class '68 after 6 years.  He served in the armed forces for almost eight years and retired as soon as it was possible. My dad is still active and exercises regularly. He also goes to church with my mother everyday.

After leaving the military, he took over the native delicacy business from my grandmother. He also became a real estate agent. My parents complement each other because while my dad is the organized and silent                         type, my mom was the aggressive and sociable one. So whenever they have a client interested in any piece of property, my dad would take care of the documents and process the sale while my mom closes the deal.

My father cared much for his parents and siblings. He was the one who had my uncle rehabilitated from drugs and helped him migrate to the USA. He also helped my grandmother with her obligations and helped her migrate to Canada. In the end, he brought her back to the Philippines as per my grandmother's request and made her happy and comfortable in her remaining years.

II. Tita Mila is a housewife who married a pelotari turned businessman. They have eight children and migrated to Canada in the early 1980's. They are now enjoying their retirement while their children visit them every weekend in their family home. Tita Mila used to be a beauty queen  and was always in beauty pageants in Cebu. She is very slim and pretty. She exercises regularly and looks very young for her age. She loves to ski  and travels a lot.

III. Tita Malou is single and an accountant.  She used to work for my sister's mom in the fashion accessories business and went to the USA to work in their US office.  After more than 25 years, she left the company and                                   worked as a private accountant. She often visits her other siblings in the USA and Canada. The last time I saw her was about 8 years ago when she was diagnosed with colon cancer. Fortunately, with all the prayers and                            support from our entire family, she survived the cancer and is now in full remission. We communicate via social media and emails.

IV. Uncle Boy was entering his teen years when our grandparents' business started going up. He enjoyed pampering from my grandparents and was  given everything he wanted. He also hanged out with the socialites of  Cebu and had many girls. Uncle boy's circle of friends was the rich and  famous teenagers in Cebu at that time. They went to nightclubs, diving in  private resorts, partied in yachts, etc. Eventually, he was introduced to drugs. He also got two girls from prominent families pregnant. He married one of them but still continued doing drugs. After several years, his wife left him and my father had him jailed. He opted to do rehab and  after two years, he left for the states. He has been off drugs for many years now. He is currently a store manager of a Walmart branch in the east coast.

V. Uncle Gi or George is an architect who also married another architect, Tita Bebot. They have no children and currently reside in Canada. They originally migrated to Singapore in the early 1990's and were offered                               better jobs in Canada. Uncle Gi also grew up when my grandparents had more resources but he chose to concentrate on his studies instead of going out with friends and partying. He is very focused in whatever he                              does but he also knows how to have a good time.

F.  Mother Side

My mother, Generosa Francisco Montinola, is the second among seven siblings. She is the eldest among her sisters so they all look up to her for advice and guidance. My mother learned to be responsible early in life because my grandparents were always busy with their business and my mom had the responsibility of taking care and feeding her brothers and sisters.

I. Tito Noli is an architect by profession and a businessman in New York. He established the US office of our fashion accessories business. Tito Noli was lucky to be at the right place at the right time. The puka shell industry was just starting and my aunt in Cebu had the suppliers and ready supply. When he showed the samples to a Macy's store purchaser, the purchaser called the store manager immediately. That day, my uncle went home with a huge order.

He was also lucky because the dollar was going up at that time. They made a huge profit from the exchange rate alone. My uncle is also lucky in gambling. He is a world poker champ last 2004. He owns several   apartments in the east coast.  His three children are all married and are doing well. Tito Noli is a very             generous person. He always make us stay at his apartments whenever we  go to the USA. He also sponsors our hotel stays in Las Vegas, Atlantic City and Connecticut.

Tito Noli is diabetic and had a kidney transplant seven years ago. He is currently enjoying his life playing poker online and getting visited by  relatives every now and then. He is always helping our relatives                                        financially. I think he has sent more than ten relatives through college. He also gave many relatives financial support to start their own businesses.

II. My Mom went to college for eight years but she did not finish any course because she would rather go to the parlor than go to class without hair and make up. She used to exercise everyday and had a slim figure. She is very poised and calm even when there is an emergency. She does not panic and she moves like a lady all the time.

My mother is very religious. She prays the rosary daily, goes to church and visits the blessed sacrament every Friday. Together with my dad,  they attend prayer meetings of the Bukas Loob ng Diyos. She is very                                  patient with our helpers and compassionate to those with fewer  resources. She encourages us to be generous with our time and blessings especially for the church. My mom is kind to all people and never judges anybody. She welcomed all our friends from all walks of life.

Although my mom did not graduate from college, she has a lot of common sense. She is a smart woman. Many of our relatives would consult her for advice when they have problems. My mom is generous                              with her time because she likes talking to people. She can also be strict  sometimes which frightens our relatives who are not doing well.

III.  Tito Jun graduated with a degree in civil engineering. He married my beautiful aunt from Bohol and together they have five children. He was a successful businessman who set up Fountainhead Bakeshop with his wife. He became a Born Again Christian in the late 1980's. He died when he was 45 years old due to massive heart attack.

IV. Tito Emong did not graduate from college. He married my beautiful aunt from Bantayan. Tito Emong was the most down to earth person among the siblings. He was always ready to help anybody who goes to him for financial support. He was also instrumental in the fashion accessories business because he had a mind of an engineer. He fabricated the machines that would cut the puka shells and put holes for the strings. When foreign buyers show him a certain product, he would find ways to make it. Unfortunately, Tito Emong passed away due to lung cancer at a young age.  Since he and his wife did not value education much, their children were not sent to good schools. Our cousins were allowed to skip school once in a while. This is why five out of their seven children are still very dependent on my aunt up to now.

V.  Tita Melvi is the genius among the siblings. She has a degree in applied physics. She married another physicist and computer genius. They have four sons who are all equally smart. They graduated from ivy league schools in the US. Tita Melvi was the brains behind FCQ Eximtrade, a fashion accessories exporter/importer  that became one of the top 100 corporations in the Philippines during the early 1980's.

VI.  Tita Vicky has a degree in accountancy and started QEXimtrade, another fashion accessories company based in New York. She married a businessman, Tito Sonny, and raised four children in the USA. Tita Vicky has a high blood sugar and is diabetic but refuses medication because she believes that God will cure her naturally. So far, she has never been admitted in any hospital so maybe her faith is keeping her body strong.

VII. Tita Vina passed the medical board exam but did not finish her residency training. She married another doctor but they are both doing business instead of practicing medicine. They have five children who are all professionals already. Due to the dividends they received from the fashion accessories business, they were able to build a house and work minimally until their children graduated from college. Right now, they are just enjoying life with their grandchildren.

G.  My Siblings

I.  Rina or Nang Nin is the eldest in our family. She graduated from ADMU with a degree in BS Psychology. She worked for several years as the HR Manager of RCBC Visayas Region before their whole family migrated to the USA in 2007. Nang Nin is our counselor and advisor for all personal and sensitive issues. Her husband used to work as a nurse but is currently a hospital manager in California after getting promoted. They have four children and the eldest is getting married next year.

II.  Loudette is the middle child in our family. She is a lawyer and works for Baker Mckenzie law firm. She is married to another lawyer and they have a son. Loudette graduated top of her high school class. She was a Gerry roxas awardee and received many medals in high school and college. She also took up BSME in ADMU before entering Ateneo Law School.

III. Ruth has a degree in management and is also a registered nurse. She married a businessman and has two daughters. She lives in Cebu and manages our native delicacy business. Ruth exercises regularly and looks really young for her age. People often think she is my daughter instead of my sister. We always meet up for lunch or dinner every week.

IV. Meliza has a degree in Management information System from ADMU. She currently manages a healthcare business in Chicago. Her husband works for the local government there and they have two intelligent and athletic sons. Liz is the most independent and outspoken sister. She has several tattoos on her body that freaked out our parents before. They have learned to accept her tats after several years.

Reflection

What does this mean to me as an Individual?

My family is actually full of people who were contented to be housewives or family men. I do not have any relatives in politics or high positions in public companies. Many of them though manage their own businesses but these were not the big companies employing hundreds of people. I also do not have many relatives in the medical or teaching professions.

As an individual, I figured that my love for teaching and being in the medical field is more of my personal choice rather than influence of family.

What is my birth position in my family?

As the second child, I consider myself one of the eldest siblings and therefore responsible for my younger sisters. The gap between my elder sister and me is less than one year so I treat her like my same-age friends. I look up to her for advice but I would still do things my way in the end.

What values do I hold important in my life? How do these affect major decisions and life directions?

I value the time spent with my family. This is the reason why I chose to be a stay at home mom while my children were growing up. I believe that it is more important to make memories together as families rather than earning so much and going up the corporate ladder especially while your children are young.

What are my struggles? What are my areas of improvement?

My greatest struggle is having humility because I tend to be proud after I do something and it turns out great. On the other hand, I compensate by downplaying my achievements, which is also wrong because it is false humility. I know I need to improve on how I address success and failures in my life.

What are my strengths?

From this genogram activity, I can say that my strength comes from my knowledge that wherever I go or whatever I do, I can always come home to a group of people who will accept me as I am unconditionally. This kind of confidence is achieved when one grows up in an environment full of people who are ready to help one another instead of bringing each other down.

In what stage of family development is my family?

For my immediate family, we are now about to enter the stage when our sons will soon leave for college and the other will follow in a few years time. I know that during and after college, our boys will already be on their own and hopefully will no longer be totally dependent on us. As much as I want to keep them with me all the time, I know that the best thing we can do as parents is to give them wings to fly. That is what my parents did to us and that is what I want to do for our children.

To whom am I closest in the family? What is the nature of our relationship?

I am closest to Jaime now. We share secrets and everything that's on our mind. Sometimes we argue but that is part of maturity. If we agree all the time then we will not be having a good conversation anymore. Jaime is my confidant and partner in our goal to raise responsible children.

To whom am I least close in my family? What is the nature of this relationship?

I think I am least close to my youngest sister. We do not share the same interests. She is very artistic and young. Although we both love each other, we can not have a long conversation because we really have different interests.

What am I proud about my family and being part of this group of people?

I am proud of our openness with one another. We know how to communicate well with each other because we were taught how when were young. We share in each other's joy and sorrows. We kind of understand each other's strengths and weaknesses and we support one another all the time.

What is often my role in my family?

I do not talk to my sisters as often as they talk with one another because I am busy doing several things everyday. However, as one of my sisters said before, they know that if they need anything or want me by their side immediately, I would be there as soon as possible. They know I would drop everything when it comes to family. In short, they can depend on me anytime.

What stressor affects my family now? How difficult are they to handle?

Our greatest stressor now is the thought of the impending separation due to work and studies. Next year, our eldest son will be in Manila and my husband will still be travelling to Iloilo every week. I will have to juggle my time between these three cities.

What resources are we using to maintain family equilibrium?

We have learned to align our priorities according to what we value most in life. It is good that my husband and I talk about things and agree to disagree sometimes.

What was the kind of family environment in which I grew up? 

My parents were hands on with our studies and spiritual life. We grew up well supported and a little bit protected from external difficulties of life. This does not mean though that we lived in an unrealistic world. My parents just wanted to raise us up like educated and well-behaved ladies. We were taught to respect everyone and have compassion for all people.

What activities did we do regularly?  How did we celebrate holidays and special occasions? 

We go to church every Sunday as a family. We always had to be at the dining table at 7pm and we waited for everyone to finish before leaving the table. We attend the 9 days Simbang Gabi before Christmas and have Noche Buena at home before opening of gifts. We celebrated New Year with family at home or in another country but always together. As much as possible, we try to be together with my parents for Easter or other special occasions.

What do I consider turning points in my family's development?  How did these affect me? 

When we all got married and left our ancestral home one by one, I could feel my parents getting sad and worried. I made sure that they would never be left behind on their own. So when my last sister decided to leave for the USA with their whole family, I asked my husband if we can move back to Cebu and he agreed. But by then, he was already close to my parents.

How did my family cope with the stressors that we all faced?

I think our faith in God has saved us from a lot of problems in life. We pray always.

Who was/is the leader in my family?  Who wields power in my family?  How is this used?

My mother is a very strong woman. But my father is the one who is the real leader because even though he is just silent, we could all feel his influence over all of us including our mother.

What was considered important in my family?  What was I often taught to remember as I was growing up? 

We had to attend mass daily and pray every night and before meals. We were always reminded that God is there whenever we need Him and we also thank Him for His blessings.

What conflicts or tension points existed in our home and how were they resolved?

My parents and my husband used to not get along with each other early in our marriage. This was because I would put my parents' interests first before my husband. When we lived in Iloilo, my husband and I were able to make our bond stronger. We learned to trust and understand each other more. So when we came back to Cebu, it was easier to discuss things with my husband when my parents had a different opinion because he knew that no matter what, I was on his side.

What were the characteristics and habits in my family that saw us through hard times?

I believe that communication played a big role in our family life. Whenever there are conflicts or problems, we discuss solutions or try to understand the problems together.

What do I observe in myself that I also see in my parents and other relatives (e.g., career choice, personal characteristics, choice of spouse/relationships, patterns of coping, patterns of relating, pathologies, etc.)?

I am very calm just like my grandparents and my parents. We hardly panic even when there is an emergency. I remembered there was a fire near our hotel and my mom asked my my dad to go ahead to the site because she had to put on her make up first. My choice of spouse is like my parents, I found someone who would complement me. If I am contented, he would push me to do more. I think he knows the word "Magis" more than I do.

What patterns, both healthy and unhealthy, do I see in my family? 

Respect and communication are what makes us strong as a family. Separation is the unhealthy pattern that I want to avoid as much as possible.

What myths do I continue to perpetuate?

None. We do not believe in myths.

How has my being part of my family shaped the person that I am today?

As part of my family especially being one of the oldest sisters, I learned to handle responsibilities early. I learned to guide my younger sisters in their studies and life in general. But I also believe that everyone in my family showed me how to be a better person by accepting me with all my flaws and loving me unconditionally.

What are the strengths of my family to which I significantly contribute?

I would like to believe that I am a uniting force in our family.

How has my family background and history shaped me as a leader?

My family background prepared me to lead people by helping with self-awareness. My family would always tell me honestly what they think of me so I know what I need to improve on. By living with four other sisters, I learned to be innovative and adaptable to different personalities and situations. I also learned to lead with love because my parents showed me how much they loved us all.

How much of how I have been shaped by my family reflective of my own leadership style and habits, i.e. dealing with people, opportunities, stress, conflicts

My family taught me to listen to others before doing or reacting to people or situations. My parents showed us how to do things before they expected us to do it. If we do things wrong, they would correct us in a way that made us understand instead of resent them.

What did I realize from this activity?

I realized that our family environment has a huge impact on how we deal with our lives outside the home. If we grow up with a balanced and wholesome family life, we also tend to look at the world as a beautiful place. However, there are some people who are not lucky enough to be blessed with this kind of environment and yet they can survive and excel in what they do so I guess in the end it is still up to the individual person to shape his or her own destiny.

How do I feel about these insights?

I know that it is not enough to just learn these things and translate them into knowledge. I have to share these insights with others so that many people can benefit from the lessons we learned for ourselves. We learn and we share then we translate what we learned into action.

How do I want to proceed from these realizations?

I will find a way to pass down to the next generation all the good values and lessons I have learned from my ancestors. I will also make sure that the next generation will learn from the mistakes made and teach them how to avoid making the same mistakes.

What course of action shall I undertake?

I am not sure yet but I know by the end of this course I will be able to know how to do what I want to do above. What I do know is that I have to learn from my life story because the journey to authentic leadership begins today.