Hi Prof Jorge,
Please see below for my genogram reflection.
Regards,
May Roxas
Grandparents:
Father's Side:
a) Jose Roxas – I was not able to meet my Lolo from my father's side for he died even before my parents were married. He was born in Tondo, Manila but was raised in Magdalena, Laguna. He was second on a brood of five. All his siblings – Angela, Nanoy, Felix and Andres are now deceased. My Lolo only reached high school and married my Lola when he was 23. In pursuit of work, he reached Lucena, Quezon where he worked in a coconut factory, but he had to stop working at an early age because of arthritis. He just stayed at home and took care of a small piggery. He died at the age of 65.
b) Donata Malaluan – Lola Atang, as she was called, is my favorite Lola – probably because I was also her favorite – the first grandchild from her only son. She was originally from Canlubang, Laguna and the youngest of the siblings – Rosendo, Angelica, Francisca and Epifania. Working in the same factory where my Lolo worked, they married when she was 20. My father told me that of the two, my Lola has the dominant character. She was strict and a disciplinarian where my Lolo was usually kind and quiet. My Lola was also not able to reach high school, but she was a jack of all trades. She labored in the field and planted sugarcane. She also did "Paglalala", a famous craft weaving at the province of Quezon. She died at the age of 93 because of lung cancer.
Mother's Side:
a) Mario Bernal – The Bernals are from Malabon, but similar with my grandparents from the father side, my Lolo together with his brothers and sisters moved to Lucena in search of work. There were six of them and only one – Lola Noneng, has passed away. The names of the living relatives are: Choleng, Adelaida, Belen and Adong. Their source of income is also the work from the factory. He only finished elementary and married at the age of 23. My Lolo was hardworking – he was a factory worker, a fisherman, a maker of fish nets and a farmer. His hard work and frugality paid off as he was able to put up their own sari-sari store and few rooms for rent.
My Lolo Itong turned 90 this year and in thanksgiving, my cousins and I threw in a big party for him last May. He still has his wits with him but he already needs someone to help him move around the house.
b) Maria Juniar – My Lola Mareng was one of the kindest and self-less person I have ever met. Since they are relatively well-off than their children – they are the normal run to when times are rough. She paid for college for some of my cousins. My parents even went to her a couple of times to seek help on my and my sister's tuition fees.
Because my Lola had a sibling who died serving in the US Military, they received a pension from the government. The sum was able to help her family live a better life. She had six brothers and sisters – Jose, Angeles, Juanito, Lucing, Iska and Supreng. She was the eldest of the girls. All of them, except Iska, have moved on to the next life. Like my Lolo, Lola Mareng was only able to finish elementary. At the age of 16, she got married. She died at the age of 87 due to breast cancer.
Parents' Siblings
Father's Side
My father is the fourth among the five siblings and the only male. Most of my father's sisters only reach elementary school. The eldest, Virginia, worked in a factory and later on was able to put up a small sari-sari store as a business. She was known to be like my Lola – strict and a disciplinarian.
The second is Felicia, but is fondly called "Tete". I really didn't know how that name came to being, but me and all of my cousins called her that. She was my closest aunt, for she took care of me until I reached one year old. I remember all the summers I spent in Lucena and I couldn't forget the special treatment I get whenever I stayed there. Even though money was scarce – she will always serve fried chicken during my visits. She worked in the factory and when it closed down, she started selling "kakanin" for a living. Her dedication to her family was boundless - she took care of the rest of her siblings and of my Lola until she died. She never married or took on a husband. My father told me that it was because of her that he was able to finish high school and get into a vocational study. Both Virginia and Tete have already passed away.
Conchita is the third sister still living. She did not work in the factory but she helped in the small piggery business. Right now, she owns a small sari-sari store and happily takes care of her grandchildren.
I have not seen nor met the youngest of my father's sisters. She went to Canada when she was 26 and she has never returned to the Philippines ever since.
Mother's Side
Like my father, my mother is the fourth among the family, but their number is greater than one. The eldest is Reynaldo – he is now in the US, petitioned by his daughter. When he was still here in the Philippines, he also worked in the factory and took care of a small piggery business.
The next one is Ricardo, he only passed away this year. Among the siblings, he was the only college undergraduate. The rest were not even able to step into college. He was able to work overseas as a driver.
The third is Flordeliza. My mother looks like her that you would think they are twins. She also worked in the factory in Lucena.
The fourth sibling is Domingo. My mother said that he and she are the closest. He was also able to work abroad but is now working as a fish dealer.
The youngest is Magdalena. She and my mother left Lucena to work in an Electronics Company in Laguna. However, she died at the age of 33 while giving birth to her 3rd child.
Parents
Father – Carlos Roxas
Unlike his siblings, my father was hard pressed on getting a good education. If only his family was able to afford it, he would have wanted to become a Mechanical Engineer. But because food at the table was more important at that time, he was only able to finish high school and study Radio TV as a vocational course. After high school, he worked as a car mechanic, however when he saw one person got injured in that line of work, he decided to quit and find another job. He worked in Ram Foods as a factory worker and then transferred to Nestle Philippines where he spent 31 years of service. Even after finding better work, he still decided to pursue studying – he took up Electrical Engineering in Rizal Technological University, but only lasted for a year because his schedule cannot accommodate being a student. He married my mother when he was 34. After the Alabang factory closed down, my family ventured into a trucking business, however that didn't went well and we got bankrupt in two years. Because my sister was still in school at that time, he applied as a shuttle driver using our van and when the contract did not get renewed, he did commuter trips from Laguna to Lucena and vice versa.
Mother – Ofelia Bernal
My mother finished a vocational course after high school – Radio Telegraph. She had no interest in working in the coconut factory in Lucena that she sought work elsewhere. She ended up working in an Electronics Company in Laguna. One would have thought that my parents met each other in Lucena since that is their hometown, but they actually met in Laguna through a common friend. It was only later when they found out that they live in the same town. My mother stopped working a year after giving birth to me. She became a housewife who helps out in the finances by occasionally baking cakes and re-selling staff shop to neighbors.
Sibling
Jennie Roxas
I have only one sibling and she is five years my junior. Because my father was no longer working and the business got bankrupt, I was the one who financed her college education. She graduated BA Psychology in Adamson University and is now working as an HR in Honda Carmona.
Reflection
Being the eldest in my family, I felt that I had the most responsibility to help out in keeping the family together. It has always been important to me that I become a good daughter. I studied hard and had no boyfriends until college. It was okay to have suitors as long as they come to the house to visit. I grew up from a traditional family where church every Sunday is a must and the approval of my parents, most especially of my father is of utmost importance. However, things started to change when I entered college. As I tasted independence, I was introduced to a new world. I remained a responsible daughter, but I learned to think for myself and to make my own decisions without consulting my parents for everything.
One thing I learned from my family history is the value of working hard and the significance of a college education. My grandparents and parents were not well-off nor had they finished school. But they still strived to work hard to provide for their families no matter how menial the type of work is. Thankfully, my father and mother started to see the importance of education and hence, made it their topmost priority. While I was growing up, both of my parents kept reminding us that they do not have riches to leave except that of education. I'm not sure I understood what they meant at that time, except that we are not rich – period. During high school, my father pushed me to study harder, so I can get into UP, because for them that is only the good school where they can afford the tuition fee.
Making this genogram is a true eye opener for me. It made me see why I am what I am now. It showed the importance of the family as a cornerstone of a person's leadership. I was able to see that working hard is ingrained in my personality for it has been a trait of the family years back. But I also saw complacency, which although is not a negative quality, is something that could still be developed. My family background and history shaped me as a leader by showing me that life is not easy and that like leadership, to be good with it, one has to work hard and persevere. None of my family members can be considered a leader in a traditional sense, they are not politicians, managers nor even professionals, but the more important thing is they can be considered as leaders in their own right for they are people who are not hesitant to do good nor to make sacrifices for others.
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