Dear Prof. Jorge
Good evening! Sending you my Genogram. Hope you find it an interesting read. A Blessed CHRISTmas season to you and your family.
Cheers!
Kerk MD.
CEBU REGIS LEADERSHIP
MY GENOGRAM
Leader KERWIN Mark L. Gubantes, MD.
I.
A. Grandparents ( Father side)
My grandfather Aurelio originated from Loon, Bohol but migrated to Larena, Siquijor when he was young. My father told me that Lolo did not have the opportunity to finish his elementary schooling and had to work his way out of poverty. He had three other siblings, Alipyo, Vicente and Eugenio whom we have never met. My earliest recollection of Lolo was in my elementary years when were brought by my father to Larena, Siquijor to attend the fiesta celebrations during May. He was a market vendor and was often drunk when he comes home in the afternoons. It was difficult to connect and bond with for obvious reasons, but more to his being a drunkard is that he was never fond of his grandchildren. Our relationship was limited to just showing our respect by blessing from the hand, ' mano po Tatang'. We never had the chance to communicate at a deeper level with him. He passed away when I was in the 5th grade..
Lola Salud grew up in Larena, Siquijor and was fortunate to finish High school education. She married Lolo Aurelio at a young age just like many women of her time. She helped Lolo working in the market at the same time given the tough task in looking after her seven children as a dedicated housewife and mother. My recollection of Lola is that she was a very religious person. Her day starts around 4:30 am to attend the dawn mass and then comes home to prepare breakfast for the family. I could still clearly remember her telling me that she would be happy to see me become a doctor someday. She had 5 other siblings, Florentino, Marcial, Generoso, Flores,and Bienvenido. Among Lola's siblings, I was fortunate to witness and experience the kindness and Love of Lola Bienvenido. She was an Elementary school teacher and remained in single-blessedness until her demise. I was very fond of her because she never misses to give me some money and food overtime we visit her. She was the epitome of kindness and a very good role model for me growing up as a kid. She had the gift of being able to relate with children that is why she was well-loved not only by her apo's but also her students. During her passing the family felt a big loss.
B. Grandparents (Mother side)
Lolo Virgilio, unlike Lolo Aurelio, came from a landed family in Bayawan , Negros Oriental. He was fortunate to have been given the opportunity to study and get a degree in Dental Medicine at the Centro Escolar University in Manila where he met my grandmother. He worked as Government Health worker in his capacity as a Dentist and was assigned to different parts of Negros Oriental and Siquijor. He served the health sector for more than 40 years before leaving for the US in 1989 as a War veteran. He eventually went home after 2 years because of a lingering illness and died in 1991. After my birth in 1973, I was growing up under his watchful eye. I was a witness to his disciplinarian approach and was sometime at the receiving end of his angry outbursts. Although he was particular with a good education for his children, his message was not well-received by some of his kids. Some of my uncles did not do well in College and never got a degree which made them a liability up to this day. He has four siblings, Protacio, Gil, Bonifacio and Jean. Lolo Bony and Lola Jean are still very much alive and are residing in the United States with there families.
Lola Josefina was born in Capiz, Aklan to affluent parent. She was also given the opportunity to study and finish her degree in Dental Medicine at the Centro Escolar University in Manila. She had three siblings, Virginia, Teodorico, JR. and Luzviminda , all of whom already joined our creator. I am very fond of Lola Pina, even until this present day. Growing up with her during my elementary and high school days has always been filled with good memories only. I could not recall any incident that she was mad at me or have spoken negatively against me. She was always soft-spoken and encouraging of my activities in school and at home. She was not only a kind and loving person to all of us, she was also the rock of the family whom we could depend on. She also worked in the Health sector like Lolo Virgilio in her capacity as a dentist for almost 40 years. After Lolo died in 1991, she went back to the United States and worked as a Caregiver to be able to provide for her family. It was thru her kind support that I was able to complete my Medical Degree. I realised how greatly she sacrificed for all of us to fulfill our dreams. Now that she has come home because of Alzheimer's disease, I have the opportunity to take care of her.
C. Parents ( Father side)
1. Oscar - my Father is the 5th among seven siblings. Although his family was hard up with resources, he did his best to get a College education in Cebu. and was able to finish Mechanical Engineering. He found a job in the late 1980's in the Middle East but had to endure the hardships of life because he married my mother at a young age of 23. I was told that he, Tito Boy and Tito Roy had the chance to work in the rice fields of Bayawan owned by my grandfather. He impressed upon me that those experiences in life made him as the person he is today.' Nothing beats hardwork, he said', and only a good education is the only way out of poverty. During my formative years, he was often away looking for work in Batangas and when I was in High school , he was in the middle east trying to provide for the family. My father was a strict disciplinarian too whenever he was around. I know that if only he had a good job here, he would have wanted to stay with his family so that he would have more time with us.
2. Ezequiel Gubantes - now 73 years old, Tito was a very simple person. Although he was able to reach College, he could only manage to work as a tricycle driver for most of his adult life. I remember that eveytime we visit them Larena, Siquijor, he never ceases to service us to and fro the pier. He has 4 daughters who are all professionals.
3. Reynaldo Gubantes - Tito died when I was in High school because of Pulmonary Tuberculosis. Although he earned his living as a Fisherman, he was a very generous and kind person. He was blessed with 8 kids most of them are Professionals and two have graduated at the Philippine Military Academy with honors and are now serving at the Airforce.
4. Helen Bitoon - Tita is my Ninang in Baptism. Another good role model for me because of her kindness and dedication to the well-being of the family. She is an elementary school teacher. I often hear of my father talking about her and hoe she helped him through life's difficult journey. Just like Lola Bienvenido, Tita Helen never ceases to amaze me with her kindness and Love. She is blessed with 6 children and most of them are professionals. She is now retired from her teaching profession and is currently looking after her grandchildren.
5. Cesaria Gubantes - Tita is now 68 and is a widow. She married an Engineer and live most of her life in Cebu city as a housewife. She has 9 children and some of them are professionals. After the death of her husband a few years ago, her life went into a downturn and has struggled ever since.
6. Elsa Gubantes - Tita is 61 now and is living a single life. She only finished high school education and is living with relatives in Siquijor. During my elementary and high school years, she used to look after me and my cousins. We are very fond of her because she has a knack of taking care of kids. Even though she never had kids of her own, she is considered a second mother to many of us.
7. Geoffrey Gubantes - Tito is the youngest amongst father's siblings. He was able to reach college but never got a degree. He worked in the DPWH as a contractual employee for most of his adult life and has also struggled to provide for his family. He has three kids and two of whom are already married. I am close to him because he always looks after me during my younger years when we visit them in Siquijor.
D. Parents (Mother side)
1. Jocelyn - My mother is the eldest among her siblings. She is very responsible in looking after her younger brothers and sisters even to this day. She married at a young age of 19 and she really struggled to raise us and was only able to finish her College Degree when I was in High School. She worked more than 30 years in an NGO - Philippine Tuberculosis Society while looking after us and our needs. She is the rock in our family and is responsible for major decisions in our family.
2. Herman Locsin - Tito Boy as I fondly call him is someone I consider a second father to me. He was instrumental in supporting my dream of becoming a physician together with my Lola Pina. He is a Medical Technologist and is now working as a Respiratory therapist in California, USA. He is the most responsible among Mama's brothers and has helped a lot of people in the family especially in the time of need. Very simple and selfless until today which I admire the most about him. He has epitomised the qualities of a person that I want to emulate - very humble, kind and hardworking.
3. Vivian Locsin-Larena - Tita just turned 60 last month and is living in Los Angeles, California for ten years now. She is married to Jun Larena, an Engineer and are blessed with two beautiful daughters who are doing ell in College. I used to bond with Tita Vie when I was in College at a time when they were still living in Antipolo, Rizal. She was very kind to me and she has really inspired me as well to do good in school through her encouragements.
4. Peter Roy Locsin - Tito is another good role model for me. Having earned his economics degree, He continued to pursue his MBA Degree in DLSU. He is currently CEO of East- West bank. I have always looked up to him during my College days having lived wit him and his family for 4 years. Even with his stature, he has remained grounded, humble and kind and has continually served in the Ministry of the Couples for Christ for many years now . He and Tita Glo are blessed with three beautiful kids who are also Professionals . They are currently living in Manila.
5. Wendell Locsin - Tito is the 5th child in the family. He got a degree in Nautical Engineering but has never maximised his potential as a person and as a Professional. He is just contented living the way he wishes without a good source of livelihood. Blessed with 4 beautiful kids, 3 of whom are Professionals and works in Manila. The family is living in Dumaguete city.
6. Anna Mae Palima - Tita Anne is living in San Jose , California with her family. I would characterize Tita as a fighter and survivor. She has a degree in Business Administration and as far as I could remember, she was involved in many business ventures until it all came down . She migrated with her family to the US 10 years ago and worked odd jobs just to get by. two of her five kids are already married but the 3 younger siblings are with them are still in Middle school. She continues to hope there condition will improve for the better someday - I pray for her.
7. Cheryl Mangaliman - Tita CHE is a Dentist just like her parents. She migrated with her family to Melbourne, Australia in the early 1990's and is doing well there. I last met her last year during her vacation and was delighted to show them around in Cebu. They are always a gracious host during our visits to there place and has remained very supportive and helpful to the plight of her relatives here in the Philippines.
8. Raul Locsin - Tito is like an Older Brother to me. Only a few years older by age , he was always there for me during my younger years. He taught me how to swim and drive and I am really grateful. He never completed his College education and is busy with farming. He and Tita Margie are blessed with 4 children who are still trying to complete there college Education. They are living in Dumaguete city.
9. Ma. Rowena Locsin - Tita Weng is a single- mother. She earned her degree in Business Administration and has been working at the Games and Amusements Board in Manila for many years now. Her daughter Be a is a nurse working at the Medical City.
10. Virgilio Locsin Jr. - Tito JUN joined his creator three years ago. He lived a troubled life and was involved in many Illegal activities like drugs and other not so good things and later a victim of his own circle of friends.. He is survived by 5 children who are really struggling to survive.
E. Siblings
1. Kerwin Mark - I am the eldest in the family with 2 beautiful sisters
2. Carlyn June - She is now 34 years old now and works as an Audiologist at the Silliman Medical Centre. She has a Degree in Nursing and a Master's degree in Clinical Audiology from the University of Santo Tomas. She has always been a loving and responsible sister and looked after the welfare of everyone including the needs of Orphaned children in our community.
3. Christine Jane - Our youngest sister is also a nurse by Profession and has earned her Masters degree in Developmental studies at the University of the Santo Tomas last year. She is trying to stand on her own and is working under a Singapore-based company in Manila. She is trying her luck to migrate to New Zealand God-willing.
II. What does this mean to me as an Individual?
A. What is my birth position?
Being the eldest Grandchild, I took it upon myself to carry the responsibilities given me and expected of me. After my father lost his job and Mama was really hard up on finances to support us, I tried my best to support the family's needs even during my Residency years and earning only a merger income. I did not see it as a pressure but a challenge to myself that I could make it good in my profession and as an Individual.
B. What values do I hold important in my Life? How does this affect Major decisions?
I have always valued Respect, Hardwork and Kindness as invaluable to growth and improvement. Respect for anyone irregardless of stature, rich or poor, friend or enemy.. I have always tried my best to be fair in my dealings with every person I encounter. Hardwork allow us to realise the value of what we earn and achieve.Kindness is what this world needs and we could start from ourselves and maybe we could make our home planet a Better World to live.
C. What are my struggles? Areas for Improvement?
I would like to improve in the aspect of being a Father to my kids. Sometimes Impatience and lack of understanding predisposes me to fits of Anger and Depression. Slowly, I try to study the dynamics of how to raise children the right way., God-fearing, respectful and responsible children. I would like to inspire the younger generation in my family and community that they may see the importance of a good education as a tool to improve there lot.
III. Growing up in my Family
A. What was the kind of environment which I grew up?
I had the privilege to witness firsthand the difficult life from my Father's side in Siquijor and the relative comfort living in my Mother's side. I saw the effects of the Authoritarian style of my Lolo Virgilio and how it folded the lives of Tito Boy and Tito Roy in contrast tot the younger brothers who have failed miserably. Respect was paramount in the family however it did not translate to living responsibly with my other uncles. My mother and father had to endure the insults from my grandfather to the point that in my second year in high school, we left the ancestral home for a small house built by my father in the outskirts of the city.
B. What activities did we do regularly? How do we celebrate the Holidays and special occasions?
My parents made sure that we are in church together during Sundays and if the budget permits, we drop by the cafe to enjoy a simple meal together. Birthdays are usually celebrated in the Ancestral home with every family member present in the community. A day at the beach is reserved in the summer. In May, whenever possible, my father would bring us to Larena, Siquijor for the Annual Town fiesta. I always look forward to this time because I could bond with my cousins and play with them. Those are really happy memories.
C. What did I consider turning points in my family's development? How did this affect me?
I was in High school then , my father felt that he was maligned so much that he could no longer stand the oppression that he decided with Mama's consent to work in the Middle East. I knew it was very hard and a tough decision for him to make and leaving us with Mama broke his heart. But he had not much choice and felt it was in the best interest of us , his beloved children. It was a sacrifice he was willing to take if only to secure our future. It was difficult to understand at first but eventually I saw the wisdom of the the decision made. Growing up with not much of a Father figure was difficult but in retrospect it was to my advantage because I matured earlier than expected and learned the hard lessons in life. Lessons which carried me thru the difficult journey in College and Medical school.
D. How did the Family cope with the stressors that we face?
Mama was a very resilient person it turned out. She carried us through sheer determination and grit. With a meager income, she budgeted our needs in college.She had to apply for different types of loans available even to the point of pawning her wedding ring just to meet our needs - I cried and felt ashamed of myself learning all these stories. But I think the most important aspect in all these trials was the Faith we have in the all powerful and loving God that created us that made all the difference.
E. Who was the Leader in the Family? Who wielded the responsibility of making the tough decisions?
It was Mama, hands down. She made all the tough decisions for the family during the hard times. She encouraged my father to work abroad and she carried us on her yoke. She was the Superman, Batman and Ironman all in one in our lives. I could not imagine how she did it but here we are, the crowning glory of her sacrifice and grit.
F. What as considered Important in my Family? What was I often taught to remember as I grow up?
Even at a young age, It was always impressed upon me that a good education was paramount and doing the best through handwork is essential to success. But in all of these, Prayer and Faith are essential elements. There will always be trials, and this will help build character.
G. What were characteristics and habits in my family that saw us through hard times?
My mother's resilience and faith in our abilities and in GOD saw us through the difficult chapter in our lives. My sisters and I understood the situation that we were in and we we did our part to make the best that we can to achieve the goals that we set. We were aware of our strengths and weaknesses such that we knew how to recognize oppurtunities and not waste precious resources.
IV. As a Leader
A. How has my family background and history shaped me as a Leader?
I believed that who we are now and what we have achieved is always reflective on how we lived our lives when we were young. I was cognizant of the fact that if I waste precious and scarce resources and opportunities, I am doomed to fail. Leaders who do not look back in there past experiences will fall prey in doing past mistakes again. Growing up witnessing two different aspects of life has made me grounded and humble. These experiences has arguably been invaluable in my dealings with our profession, our Medical Society and our community. It has always reminded me to stay humble and to embrace failure as a stepping stone in improving myself as a person and as a Leader.
B. How much of How I have been shaped by my family reflective of my own Leadership style and habits? i.e. dealings with people, opportunities, stress and conflicts?
Alot! Leadership is not taught, it was not taught to me by my parents nor grandparents. However, the varied experiences that I have been through, good and bad since childhood have folded my perspective in Leadership. The respect, hardwork, kindness and humility exhibited by different members of my family has definitely shaped my character as a person. These are the same values that I think are essential in making a good Leader effective in solving different problems and conflicts. I intend to impart these values to my children.
V. Insights
A. What did I realise from this activity?
First of all, completing the task at hand is a feat in itself. Second, I am thankful for it made me aware of the parallels, common traits of the two families where I came from. This has also improved my awareness of the different behaviour that I exhibit day in and day out. Given this renewed sense of self, it would help improve my perspective as a person and as a leader. I realised that Family is very important and we should take good care of our loved ones.
B. How do I feel about these insight?
I am just thankful of my Heritage, thankful of how my family raised me and made me who I am today. The values I learned through the years from my loved ones are priceless and will prove invaluable in my dealings in the future.
C. How do I want to proceed from these realisations?
Definitely, I am a work in progress and still have a lot of room for improvements. For as long as I could afford, I will continue to advocate for good Education and work hard towards helping other members in the family and community in achieving there purpose and goals. i will do my best to be a good role model just like my Tito Boy and Tito Roy and Tita Helen who made a significant impact in my life. I will be a good Father to my kids and influence their lives hoping that they may live responsibly and contribute positively to the community and in Nation-building. I will be an example of a leader who is Kind, Humble, Hardworking and Respectful....
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