Hi Prof,
Pls. find below my genogram.
Grandparents (Father Side)
1. Saturnino Flores (died in 1998)
There was not much information known about him since he came from a province far from our hometown, except that he originated from Bimmale, Pangasinan. He relocated to Benito Soliven and lived with my grandmother. He was a farmer who've had several lots to support his family. He died at our tender age, so we have not had many memories or interactions with him.
2. Maria Lungan (died in 1997)
My grandmother was a native of Benito Soliven. She did not finish elementary (I guess the need to complete education was not very common then or the necessity is not evident). She was a plain housewife tending to their five (5) children.
3. Children
1.1 Ernesto (died in 2010)
High school graduate; retired as Police officer in our town.
Children
1.1.1 Charito Sunico – Best in Mathematics, graduated salutatorian in high school, now a high school teacher holding an advisory class and leading a (students) team in the Math Olympiads; Great advisor.
1.1.3 Florie Sanchez – consistently with honors during elementary and high school; studied B.S. Criminology at Cagayan Colleges Tuguegarao; graduated from the Philippine National Policy Academy; currently a Police Senior Superintendent of the Bureau of Jail Management and Penology, warden of the Paranaque City Jail. Under her watch the facility won several awards including "Best Warden of the Year 2015".
1.1.4 Josefina – completed college; housewife
1.1.5 Ernesto Jr. – completed college, currently working in Saudi Arabia
1.2 Flora (Auring)
Plain housewife with eight (8) children namely, Fannie, Joven, Joel, Norio, Jomar, Jonel, Jenio, Jack, Carmen. Due to limited resources children have not completed college education except Jomar and Carmen. Jomar completed college due to persistency. His parents had no means to send him to school. So in high school, he needed to live with relatives (most period with our cousin Charie), help in household chores to be near the school and to have daily subsistence allowance. Despite having to work after school, he'd been consistently in honor roll. He finished college taking up B.S. Criminology thru the combined help of relatives who sensed his strong determination to finish college. He joined the Philippine National Police, worked hard until his way to become (now) a Senior Inspector. He finance the college education of his sibling Carmen, who is now a licensed teacher.
1.3 Romeo
Farmer with three (3) children namely Madda, Luz and Bobot. All finish elementary education.
1.4 Leonardo
Farmer with seven (7) children namely Amparo, Balen, Vilma, Nita, Rey, Rick, Noemi; most completed high school.
1.5 Manuel (my father)
The youngest among siblings.
Grandparents (Mother Side)
1. Faustino Baligod (died in 2009)
High school graduate; skilled worker of the Department of Public Works and Highways; he retired early due to medical condition.
2. Nieves Agustin
Elementary undergrad; they can be considered well-off and influential while young because her father was a barangay captain who owns several farms. However they were displaced due to the power struggle between Don Juan Dimson and Dr. Valdez. <who are they?> To avoid threat to their lives, their family settled in the mountains. This drastically changed her life so while others were content with almost nothing, she industriously worked selling dried fish, vegetables, etc. to earn money, to afford delicious meals served on the table which she was used to. She is very strong willed.
3. Children
3.1 Flora (my mother)
The eldest among siblings.
3.2 Bernarda
Vocational course (Secretarial) graduate; she worked in admin positions then later went abroad for domestic jobs. She is warm that families she served keep in touch with her, on many occasions they invited and treated her as guest back in their homes, in their countries. She is now married to a foreigner who adores her.
3.3 Elisergio (died in 1994)
College undergrad; got married with three (3) children; relocated in Davao, his wife's hometown; he'd been in several skilled job positions, most as security guard and died (due to heart attack) while on duty.
3.4 Marcos (died in 1985)
High school graduate; he joined the Armed Forces of the Philippines and was assigned in Cagayan. Though we only interacted for a short period of time, I perceive him as a courageous soldier; He died from operations leaving a wife.
3.5 Zosimo (died in 1987)
Completed 2 years vocational course; His brother's death did not dishearten but inspired him to also join the military. However after completing an operation, on his way back from Leyte, he was one of the casualties of the deadliest sea transport accident in the Philippines – the collision of MV Dona Paz with the tanker MT Vector. At a very young age, he died single.
3.6 Francisca
The youngest among siblings; a graduate of B.S. Commerce, worked as secretary, got married with two children and settled in Pangasinan; She set-up a palay buying business; due to frugality, background in business, good management of people (working for her) and most importantly good relationship and transparency with her kabarrio's, she has become the preferred buyer of the farmers outputs which helped the gradual growth of her business. From nothing, she has turned her business into a million working capital business.
Parents
1. Manuel Flores (Father)
My father is a high school graduate. Despite not having any college degree, he managed to secure good jobs in Saudi Arabia. He was expected to do farming like his brothers that which he strongly defied. He said he didn't want to work in the farm all his life. Apart from it requiring heavy physical work, farming could not pay enough to sustain a family plus he wanted to have a choice and experience in doing something else. So he ventured out from our town, worked in National Irrigation Administration, then transferred to Hydro Resources contractor company. His income was short for family spending so he decided to work abroad. Although he only completed two years of college, he managed to get administrative work as office machine technician. When all children (three of us) finish education, he retired and went back to Philippines for good.
2. Flora Baligod (Mother)
My mother was a school achiever. But at a young age, before finishing college she got married to my father. My grandparents stopped supporting her, so my father while providing for family needs also financed my mother to finish her degree in Agriculture. After completing college, my father worked abroad so she had to attend to us full time.
Siblings
1. Bernie Flores
Eldest child; a graduate of B.S. Criminology and has been part of the Philippine National Police before immigrating to Canada in 2011. He is married with one (1) son. Just like many other professional Filipinos who migrate to Canada.
2. Carmen Flores
Youngest child; followed my path of taking B.S. Accountancy who also successfully passed the CPA exam. She has had several local employments in the banking sector as Finance Analyst prior to venturing outside the country and landing a job in a ship maintenance company in Abu Dhabi.
3. Mel
Middle Child
Birth position-
According to some researches, the middle child normally develop these personality traits: Low self-esteem, Shyness, Diplomats and can become problem child. However, in my case, the closest personality trait I have is only being shy which according to a research is an indication of the person's low estimation of self-worth. In my case, I have become shy because of the discipline instilled strictly by my grandmother.
Closest in the Family-
In the family I am most close to my sister. With merely 2 years gap, we essentially grew up together, from elementary to high school every morning we wake up at the same time, take breakfast and even take shower sharing bathroom. She depends on me, however I have a different approach as an older sister. I learned to survive on my own, so she has to find her way out of life as well. I have always been detached from people including my family. Though now, me and my sister had been more close as after having our own families and we discuss anything from problems to great news. I or she would always the first to know any news concerning us.
What is often my role in the family-
I am the practical problem solver in the family. My brother who is very cautious would take a lot of time to come up with a solution, my sister on the other hand is very (sometimes unreasonably) considerate, and I am the one able to provide practical solutions at the reasonable time.
How has my family background and history shaped me as a leader?
Since our parents worked abroad, away from us most of the time, the generation gap with my grandparents, imposing too conservative, impractical rules on us and on our behavior, created an invisible wall between us and our grandparents and us and the world. We were being raised in ways of one era different from the era we were living. As such at a point we had to take charge, forced ourselves to make a stand to blend in and to thrive in the challenges of the world we live in.
How much of how I have been shaped by my family reflective of my own leadership style and habits, i.e. dealing with people, opportunities, stress, conflicts
I would say that my leadership style and habits have only been influenced by family to a certain stage. It properly guided me with the basic values to be good at home. But not necessarily to be great in the world. In my take, although my family have been great instruments in getting the proper education and generally peaceful home environment, the most part of my leadership style and habits, were based on my own personal choices. There are some values that I have learned and kept from my family's teachings and experiences, but substantially what I have maintained were largely picked from education and from experiences in dealing with the outside world, outside of home. Like for example, I have been raised to respect to please people, so that they will not say bad things about me and the family. My value as a leader has shifted to the importance of doing the right thing even if people will speak wrong or put negative regard on me.
INSIGHTS
What did I realize from this activity?
One group of my family have not completed education up to the college level generally due to financial reasons and mostly became farmers. Another group, despite the financial limitation, strive to get themselves or their children the necessary education, and mostly excelled in school and in their work, as peace officers, teachers and accountants. My father was the only one who valued education, who despite lacking college degree worked hard found job that would not normally taken by his family to successfully send all his children to complete college. On the third generation, my cousins from Uncle Ernesto despite their father not being keen on sending them to college, found their own ways to get their degrees who worked as students, or even when they got married ask the support of their spouses to complete their education. Most notable is my cousin Jomar, his parents were not capable nor had the intention to support his education, but because of strong determination, he humbly worked from one relative to another and asked assistance if needed from others just to have a degree. In summary, there are a lot people from my family who proved they can accomplish significant things by merely having the determination and the courage to ask for assistance (equally important) to achieve their dreams/goals despite any limitation.
How do I feel about these insights?
The above signifies that the family genes was endowed with intelligence, emotional and physical strength, but we have differed in achievements due to difference in levels of will. My father and his siblings have all not completed college but my father saw the value of education and strived to provide his children with proper education by taking jobs not ordinarily taken by his siblings. By going against the common (most of them ended into farming like their father) and finding other means to meet our needs. I feel lucky that my father made it less challenging for us, eliminating the test of financial limitation on our will to finish college. Our only test was completing the requirements of the school and the temptation for youths (drug addition, parties, money madness, etc.) that other kids, with parents away from them would tend to fall into.
How do I want to proceed from these realizations/
What course of action shall I undertake-
Financial incapacity is normally the reason why people would not finish school or get adequate education to alleviate their lives. Being an accountant and expert in finance, I would like to help in providing or elevating the financial literacy of parents and the youth to minimize financial incapacity as the reason for not completing education weakening their chances to be in control of their future's stability. By helping others improve their lives, would I hope in turn increase the birth of leaders. In my own family, I will ensure my daughter will get the proper education for her to take care of her life and to affect the lives of others (the heroic purpose of leaders). On the other hand, I would like to tap groups of youths and parents, share my expertise to help them manage their financials and their life. The participation of ordinary citizens in our Philippine Stock Exchange is low compared to others countries, and most are trap in consumerism as evidence by growing and profiting department stores, malls and local and international consumer brands in the country. Although there are already a number of groups aiming to alleviate the financial literacy and improve the investment or savings habits of our countrymen, there is still a large room for growth. And this is one of the areas where I plan to lead.
Mel
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